The art of timing

Over the years I have learned how important it is to time things out correctly. For instance, today is Sunday and we will go to church today. I get up with the boys on Sundays and let Eric sleep in. I iron our clothes for the day while watching In Touch with Charles Stanley. If I don't, Drew will remind me to put church on. I get ready first, then help the boys get their showers and help them to get ready. When they are done, they go wake Eric up and he starts his morning routine. Which takes him about a half hour. So, if any of this starts early and we are done early, the boys are ready to go and they will open the garage door and go out to the van. If we don't get out there within a minute or two, this causes agitation, tears and shouts of, "NO CHURCH!" Church starts at ten and we drive about twenty minutes to get there. If we have done things right, we'll arrive at the same time as my sister and her family. If not, and we get there early, Drew will be upset and begin to fall apart. And that makes Blake mad, so he will hit and yell at Drew, and that in turn upsets Drew all the more. It is amazing to me how a couple minutes of waiting time can throw a wrench in the whole day. At least several hours. Over the years, I have heard how we should have a bag of activities to do in times of unexpected waiting. And that works for some kids with Fragile X. And it could possibly work for Blake. But Drew would throw the bag of goodies across the room. Sometimes we can stall him with television or computer time, but usually when he is ready to go, he is ready to go. I have used a visual timer for some things, but Drew's threshold for staying calm during these times is pretty low. Needless to say, this can be frustrating. I am trying to think of ways to help the boys deal with moments of waiting.