Monday, August 15, 2011

More motivation for schedules

So yesterday Eric and I decided to take the boys school shopping.  We went to Sears first and saw a backpack that would work well for Drew.  We then went on to the shoe department.  We didn't find anything we wanted there, so we asked them to hold the backpack and went on to Shoe Sensation.  They were having a big sale on Skechers, (buy one, get one half off)  which is what the boys wear.  They were the velcro Z-strap type shoes.  Well, we allowed Drew to take the Sears shopping cart into the mall to make the transition easier for him.  That was ok, but he didn't want to go into Shoe Sensation. 

In a brave move, Eric asked the sales clerk if we could take a pair of shoes into the hallway to try them on our special needs son who had too much trouble coming in the store.  She looked conflicted, but decided to allow us to take one shoe out to try it on him.  This worked rather well.  Drew sat on a mall bench and I went out and helped him try on the shoe.  We discovered that his feet have not grown, but he still needs a new pair, since the old ones are quite worn out.  He cooperated well.  I think it helped that the store has one whole wall that is glass and one of the clerks stood watching us.  And that Eric and Blake were still in the store.  Blake had his heart set on the exact same pair of shoes he had before.  The only problem with that was they didn't have his size.  We told them we'd be back. 

We went on to JcPenney and looked at clothes for the boys.  Blake felt up a mannequin who was modeling a bra and underwear.  Drew pushed his cart around while Eric and I looked for pants to try on them.  Well, I guess Drew'd had enough and stood in the women's department saying, "No pants!  I stay out of pants!"  We should have taken that as our cue.   We went on to look at Blake's size shirts where Drew followed us, but started throwing clothes off the table and onto the floor.  We quickly decided to buy everything, try it on at home and return what didn't work.  I told Eric I'd head toward the van with the boys and he could stop at Sears and buy that backpack and meet up with us in the van.  Drew heard me and was quite upset. "No van!" he said.  Blake wanted to stay with Eric, so I told Drew that was ok, we could just wait in the mall then.  He took off at a run with his cart and let it go at the doors of JcPenney.  It went flying into a display stand which held some flyers.  The metal thing crashed to the floor and everyone within hearing range (read: the whole mall-or so it seemed) came to see what the ruckus was about.  I put Drew in timeout, mostly just so he'd stay put while I cleaned up the mess and tried to reassemble the display. 

Eric and Blake came out of JcPenney and they went on to Sears, leaving me and Drew to go at our own pace.  Which, as it turns out, was a full-on run.  Now, Drew is not that coordinated and you'd think I could keep up with his crazy run.  Of course, after the huge display debacle, you'd think any shred of dignity I have would be gone and I'd make haste in chasing after him.  But no.  Not me.  I tried to walk quickly, but refused to run.  Well, he abandoned his cart and went out of the store into the parking lot and to the van.  By the time I got to him, he was biting the heck out of his arm and screaming that the van was locked.  Thank the Lord that He kept Drew safe, because I surely didn't.

I didn't really even try to talk to him, because I knew he was beyond hearing.  Eric and Blake came out and we drove to the other side of the mall, where Eric ran in and bought the shoes for the boys, settling on a second choice for Blake.  We'll have to see how that goes over. 

Anyway, Drew was upset, saying, "No snack!  No milk!" for about five minutes.  After that, he was fine. 

I would be lying if I said Eric and I handled it well.  We dealt well with the kids, but were snapping at each other.  There was some miscommunication in the first place about whether we were going shopping or not in the first place, so we didn't put it in the schedule for them.  We did tell them in advance, and they seemed ok with it at the time, but who knows?  Anyway, I am more determined than ever to use the schedule.

In fact, I got out the picture schedule I got from Cindi Rogers at the Missouri Fragile X conference we went to and made one up for tonight.  I had to make a generic "Grandma's house" one because my printer is out of ink, but it works.  We've already done step one (snack) on the schedule.  That worked well.

We are currently weaning Drew off his Prozac for the Arbaclofen trial we are starting in six weeks, so I am hoping the schedule will alleviate some of his anxiety in the meantime.


Kim C said...

I want so badly to post an encouraging comment, but everything seems so trite! I will just say (once again) what a great mom you are, how lucky your family is to have you, and how proud you should be of how well you handle sticky situations!