A walk in my town

Yesterday I had to drop my van off to get new brakes and I realized I had my camera with me. I decided to snap some pictures to share with you. This is the town I grew up in and the town where I still live. There are like 2500 people in my little town. It is officially a village, actually.

Here we go:

This is me beginning my walk from Gaier's Garage to work at the school.
This is were I dropped my van off. I used to ride my bike past it on the way to our little grocery store to get candy.

This is the Dairy King. Not Dairy Queen--Dairy King. It looks basically the same as it did when I was a kid. Of course the price of a small cone back then was like a quarter. Moving along...
See that grey building? It is now part of the Historical Society, but when I was a kid, it was the town library. Man, I loved that place. It was tiny, and floor to ceiling books. It had that wonderful bookish smell. There was a machine that imprinted the due date on the card that went in the back pocket of your book. Ka-thunk! That's what the machine sounded like when it made the imprint. I longed to ask if I could try it, but never had the nerve to actually ask.

This is the museum in our town. When I was a kid, it was only open occasionally. They would put up a sign that said, Museum Open Today. Let me just tell you, if I saw that sign, you can bet I'd stop in. There were things from the founding of our town by Peter Loramie. There was an old fashioned candy counter where you could get a long licorice whip. If you went upstairs, they had my favorite room. You could step into the room a couple feet, but were prevented from going in any further by three panes of glass. This room was known as the doll room. They had all kinds of old fashioned dolls and buggies for them. I would eat my licorice and look at all the dolls.

This used to be the town hardware store, and it was just down the street from where I lived. Why would I show you a picture of that? Well, it was relevant to my life this reason: they had a machine to make keys. And my sister and I were always losing our house keys. We'd bring the spare key up to Don Braun, (aka-Braun Braun) and have him make duplicates for us for a dollar and five cents. I am sure he thought we were crazy, and wondered why we had so many keys made, but boy was it convenient for staying out of trouble. Thinking back, there were probably dozens of copies of our house key floating around town.

This is the view down the street from the hardware store. See the white house on the right? That's my mom and dad's house, where I grew up.

There is the house where I grew up. It was built in the 1800's, and was said to be haunted. It wasn't and isn't. Unless you count the bat we discovered last night. It sure scared my dad.
And this is the view from my mom and dad's house. It is the only church in our town. St. Michael's Catholic Church. We never had a good excuse for being late to church on Sundays, though we often walked in right before the priest did.

This is the school where I spent nine years. From Kindergarten through eighth grade I walked the half block to get here. This year is it's final year. They are currently builing a new school behind it. They will demolish the old school next summer, I believe. It is needed, but it will be bittersweet. There are a lot of memories that were created there. My own grandmother, who was born in 1907, went to school in the oldest part of the building.

And finally, here is the cafeteria. It is where I ate all my lunches, and where I now work. And that is the reason it is also the last picture in my walk. Thank you for keeping me company along the way.

Brothers

Before we had Blake, we didn't think having another child would be the best thing for Drew. We wanted to be able to give him as much undivided attention as we thought he needed. But, as I have said before, God had other plans for us.

When Blake came along, Drew had a terribly hard time adjusting to not having his mommy to himself. He was interested in Blake, but wanted to be held a lot. I wasn't allowed to lift him for the first week, and that was hard. I admit that I bent the rules at that time. Drew would come up to me wanting to be held. I would try to pick him up, and he'd throw himself on the floor and cry. I was trying to get the hang of breastfeeding Blake at the time, so a lot of time was spent in the recliner with Blake in my arms. I remember trying to pull Drew up into the chair with us. He wanted to be up there, but not with Blake.

This was taken at the hospital. Drew fell asleep standing up while we waited for the ok to go home:


These were taken after we were home and Blake had to use a bili-blanket for jaundice.

At the time, we were involved in a research study with Dr. Jennifer Hill-Karrer in Kansas City. She sent us a gift to welcome Blake, and in it, she sent a Thomas the Tank Engine tape for Drew. That tape was a major blessing to us. He watched it practically every time I nursed Blake, and it occupied him thoroughly.



Over time, they have become the best of friends. I often marvel at how different two boys who came from the same parents can be. Where Drew is cautious and hesitant, Blake is unconstrained and impulsive. Blake draws Drew out and gets him out of his comfort zone. Drew tempers Blake's recklessness. If Blake hits, Drew will say, "Blakie, be gentle."




They play well together and have so much fun. Before I had kids, I envisioned myself to be the mother of daughters. Perhaps that is because I am one of two daughters and had no brothers. It didn't really enter my mind that I could have all boys. I am outnumbered by them! But I don't think I'd have it any other way.

Having more kids

I was debating about what to blog about today. I thought about some fluff or possibly a Wordless Wednesday picture. I started reading my usual blogs, and read Erika's post about having more kids. Her blog is HERE

Drew was two months old or so when we found out that he had Fragile X. After a consultation with a geneticist, we learned that I had to carry the Fragile X gene. At the time, we were so wrapped up in what to do about Drew having Fragile X that we didn't think about having future children.

When he was a year and a half or so, I started thinking about whether we'd have more kids. Eric and I discussed it. I was actually thinking that it would be a good idea. Eric was not. He said that we have to put so much effort into the care and keeping of Drew that it wouldn't be fair to him or a new baby if they had to split our attention. I was sort of ok with this line of thinking, sort of not ok with it. I wanted to explore the possibility of sperm separation to increase the likelihood of having a girl. I thought it would be nice to have a girl and a boy, and even if that girl had Fragile X, they were typically not as affected as boys with Fragile X. Eric thought this was a bad idea. He asked how Drew would feel if he knew we tried not to have another boy child with Fragile X, like we "could do better". I did see his point. Still unsure of what to do, we decided to just keep discussing it, and not make any decisions.

Well, God decided to help us with that decision. When Drew was two years old, I became pregnant unexpectedly. I knew my carrier status and that there was a fifty percent chance that the baby I carried had Fragile X.

There were lots of emotions during that time. Surprise, of course for one. Joy at having created a new life as well. There was also sorrow for our lives that would change as we knew them. I was afraid of having a "normal" child and having Drew know that he was different than his brother or sister. I was afraid of having another affected child, and whether we'd be able to handle it. We decided not to get prenatal testing done since it wouldn't change the child either way, and abortion would not be considered whether the child had Fragile X or not.

After Blake was born, I felt pretty certain he had Fragile X. It was not a huge shock when he was diagnosed. He was a special blessing sent from a God who knew our needs even when we did not. Though he has Fragile X, he is not as developmentally affected as Drew is. He gets Drew out of his shell and they are the best of friends. I can't imagine life without Blake.

Now, five years later, I can say with certainty that we won't be making any more babies on purpose. Not because of the chance of having another baby with Fragile X, but because our family feels complete.

For stories from other mothers on this topic, visit:

Basically FX

The Other Lion

Fragile What?!

Memories from the fragile x trenches

I sort of lifted this idea from Beth at Fragile What?. She is going to start sharing memories from her life with kids with Fragile X. I thought it was a great idea and decided to steal it.

So, here is one of mine:

In 2002, we were surprised to learn that I was expecting our second baby. We knew that any child I have has a 50% chance of having Fragile X. My obstetrician offered to do testing, which we turned down. We did go for a level two ultrasound. They said there were some markers they could check. (when Drew was in-utero, ultrasounds showed that he had dilated ventricals in his brain) We had the ultrasound and they said they thought it was a boy and that everything looked normal. At later ultrasounds, my doctor said he thought it might be a girl. We didn't put a whole lot of stock in what this doctor said, as he is notorious for gender predicting mistakes.

Blake was born (A boy!) after a relatively quick labor. He had an indent in his chest. His hip had a click. They referred us to a specialist to have an ultrasound of the hip done. We quickly learned that he also had reflux. Honestly, when I saw the hollow chest, I felt sure that he had Fragile X. The other things confirmed it in my mind.

Around that time, we had Drew enrolled in two different Fragile X Studies. One was in Kansas City with Dr. Jennifer Hill-Karrer. We were going out every four months to have Drew's brain waves recorded. She had told us when I was pregnant with Blake that when he was born, we could have him tested as a part of their study. He was probably about two months old when we flew out there to have him tested. There was a delay in getting the results because Dr. Hill-Karrer's husband had been ill, and she was away from the office. Finally in August, she called me one night and told me that Blake did have Fragile X Syndrome. This didn't come as a big surprise to me. I already felt certain that he had it. Ironically, I remember that the night she called was the first night he rolled over. He was four months old at the time. Eric was in Canada on a fishing trip. I had to wait until he came home to tell him. He wasn't too surprised, either. With Drew, it had been a huge blow, as we had no idea there was even a chance of it. He was enrolled in Early Intervention immediately.

More memories to come....